How do we become conscious?

In our daily lives we all say things we don't really believe, or say things that we don't really think are true, or say things that are polite or socially acceptable. These thoughts come into our consciousness and into our hearts, but we don't really believe them. We say them or think we believe them because they are the acceptable thing to say.

I see this all the time; from talking with people to online stories to the cover of magazines ... polite, acceptable, conventional thought (see the post regarding thinking differently). We are afraid of saying what we truly believe in our hearts and are programmed to say and do what we think we are supposed to.

And unfortunately we have been instructed for so long to think/feel appropriate that we no longer even realize that we don't necessarily believe what we are saying. We are not conscious that our true beliefs are out of sync with our language.

So how do we become conscious?

It seems that as long as our thoughts and words don't push against our sensibilities, then polite and acceptable ideas work fine. It is when our thoughts and words push up against our true beliefs that we become uncomfortable ... and being uncomfortable is a good thing ... it makes us question our inbreed assumptions and beliefs.

So push to the edges ... push to the extremes ... that is where it is most uncomfortable ... that is where everyone else's influence on your beliefs start to fall apart and where there is the most clarity. It is also the scariest place to be ... the edge ... the extreme ... because that is where everything is at risk ... all of your long held beliefs.

So next time you say something, push it to the limit to see if what you say at the extreme is still the same as what you say in the comfortable middle, like:

"I don't have the money to ???" ... just ask yourself, if the ??? was a medical procedure for a loved one, could/would you find the money? That's extreme (an extreme thought experiment). If you could/would find the money, then the "I don't have the money to ???" fades away and is replaced with the more honest "I don't want to ???" Probably harder to say, but more truthful.

- or -

"I have to / I can't ???" ... just ask about the ??? and create an extreme thought experiment. If the ??? was something obviously right (ie. save a child from a car crash), or obviously wrong (ie, hurt an innocent person), then the "I have to / I can't ???" fades away and is replaced with the more honest "I don't want to ???" or "I won't ???" Probably harder to say, but more truthful.

So find the extremes, push to the edge and see where you go.

See you on the wire

Steven

Do my words matter?

I was having an intense conversation with a very close friend of mine the other day and she asked for my opinion about a specific set of circumstances. Of course me being me, I couldn't resist putting in my $0.02. However, what struck a cord in me was the fact that she cared about my opinion. And the question that came to mind was "why does she care?"

The band Staind has a great song called "Everything Changes" and a line in the song is "What could I really say. And would it matter anyway?" That line has struck a chord in me since I first heard it. People will feel what they feel, do what they do, believe what they believe, regardless of what someone else says.

So the real question is "Do my words matter?" and of course the follow up "Do I matter?"

Probably not. Whatever we say won't make a difference ... unless what you are saying is the truth (see the rest of this blog for discussions about the truth) ... if it is the truth then your opinion, your perceptions, all your distortions fall away and your words illuminate what is real.

Words can be hollow, fake, mask truth. You can say you love someone, that you'll be there, that you didn't mean it, that you will do something, or want something, but unless you act that way (see congruence post), then these words don't matter.

So, maybe the fact that she wanted my opinion ... my words ... was just an exploration for the truth.

And I guess that is a compliment enough that she believes in me enough to take a moment to explore the truth with me.

See you on the wire

Steven Cardinale

The language of thought

How do we think? What do we think in? George Carlin has a great quote when he talks about offensive language. He says: "we do think in language and so the quality of our thoughts and ideas could only be as good as the quality of our language."

I believe that there has never been so true a statement as Carlin's quote above. So if we think in language (which means people never say anything they don't mean, because we mean all of our thoughts ... if only for a moment), then you should be able to take a step outside yourself ... take a quick look at what you are saying ... and get a glimmer of what you are thinking ... which means get a glimmer of truth, however fleeting. Easy to say, but tough to do.

George Carlin also said "There are no bad words. "Bad thoughts. Bad intentions. And woooords."

And this implies that the words are only an expression of the mind/heart/soul/true feelings of the individual. And that means that if we quiet ourselves, we can listen to the voices in our heads and truly hear what they are saying.

The real question is "How do we know when what we are saying in our heads are truly our thoughts/intentions, or those of everyone else?"

I hope George found the answer ... although he was pretty clear about his point of view ... and that is ... there is no answer.

See you on the wire

Steven Cardinale

Recognizing change

I just watched a great flick called "The Air I Breathe" and it really speaks to the discussions this blog tries to expose. One of the quotes from the movie is:

"So where does change come from? And how do we recognize it when it happens?"

This quote became vitally important as I was having a great dinner, with some passionate conversation and I met someone who heard, if only for an instant, something that was different ... interesting ... thought provoking ... changing ...

At least that is what I thought I saw ... that is what I recognized ... change ... at least in that person. It is a brilliant little moment, a bright spark that burns at 2,000 degrees when you see it; like the tip of a firework - a roman candle - bright, white hot, attention grabbing. That recognition of insight is what the quote above seems to be talking about.

"where does change come from?"

I think it comes from a shift in perspective. It comes from looking at the world clearly without the filter of our own perceptions, if only for a brief moment. And seeing how our decisions, actions, and thoughts, are all intertwined and feeling that great draw pull us in that direction. It seems that change comes from a dissatisfaction of our own journey and from an intense desire for more ... more passion, more clarity, more honor, more truth. Unfortunately in reality it seems that only a few people truly want more because it also seems that wanting ... really wanting, with a white hot passion ... more, can be frightening, and hard to swallow, and requires letting go of your past beliefs.

And the second part of the quote:

"And how do we recognize it when it happens?"

I think you can recognize when it doesn't happen because of the intensity of drive to maintain the argument and the status quo. You can recognize when change happens, because it simply happens and there is no need to defend the change. It is like looking in a new direction, or turning left instead of right; it needs no justification. You recognize change because the past simply vanishes.

Then again ... I could be wrong

See you on the wire

Steven