Friday, July 9, 2010

Go ahead ... be reckless

I'm going through songs I haven't heard on my iPod and I came across Alicia Keys' song "Wreckless Love".  Great sexy song about being reckless .... and that got me thinking ...

When was the last time you were reckless? The dictionary defines reckless as "heedless or careless" and the opposite as "careful" or "timid".  And when was the last time that anything spectacular, amazing, life changing, memorable, truly unique came out of being careful or timid?  Seth Godin had a blog entry entitled "Low esteem and the factory" that basically says if you want to do anything amazing, you need to have people who haven't "been brainwashed into believing that they're not capable", basically finding people who are not careful and timid but at times are willing to be a bit reckless.

Now I'm not suggesting betting the farm or risking everything on an untried, untested idea.  You need to be reckless in a way that won't have massive consequences if you're wrong ... because you're reckless idea ... reckless thought ... reckless path probably won't be that amazing win you think it will be.  But then again, there's a chance it will be.  And in fact if you're careful or timid, I can guarantee that things will be ... boring, repetitive, un-amazing.

So here's my question: "How can you be more reckless?"  What can you do today, tomorrow, soon, to take a risk, do something you would never consider doing, be just a bit more reckless than you usually are.

Tomorrow, I want you to do something reckless; something outside your comfort zone; something that you'd never consider doing; something that is not careful and timid, and see where you end up.  Do this once a week and see what happens.  Ask that reckless question, eat that reckless food, go to that reckless place, meet that reckless playmate.  And maybe you'll taste something truly spectacular if only for a moment.  After all those breathless moments (see my Swept Away post) are what life's all about.

See you on the wire

-- Steven Cardinale

Friday, July 2, 2010

Goldilocks

You know the story ... the three bears, the empty house ...

"This bed is too hard" ... "This bed is too soft" ... "but THIS bed is JUST RIGHT"

Have you ever had one of those Just Right days? Kind of a Goldilocks experience? A day when everything was ... just right? Have you ever know that person, had that gig, been at that place where everything fit like a glove, where it all seemed to be so effortless (see my blog on Effortless)?

I've been talking to a bunch of people about Goldilocks days.  About days and times and relationships that fit so well they seem magical, they seem like they really shouldn't exist, it seems like it's too easy and finding it just by accident is just too much luck.

But how amazing is it when that serendipity kicks in and you just find something that's tailor made for you? The French have a phrase for something that fits perfectly "Près du corps", it means "close to the body."  Now don't start telling people that phrase unless you want a whole lot of attention, because it is a very romantic phrase. What's interesting is that phrase gets Goldilocks moments to a tee. Goldilocks - Just Right - Made to Fit - Tailor Made - Fits Like a Glove - Made Just for Me ... Près du corps


So here's my question: "What would it take to manifest Goldilocks moments?" "What would it take to design a life around Près du corps?"  Could you? Could you only engage when it feels right, when it's a perfect fit, when it's so comfortable you're not willing to take it off? I know we'd all love to live a life like this ... but we probably don't all believe we deserve to live a life like this ... so when happens by chance we're dumbfounded. So if  you believe, just for a moment, that you deserve a Près du corps life, and you're awake enough to what you really want (self awareness) then maybe just for a moment, you'll make Près du corps choices and get a glimpse under Goldilocks' sheets.


See you on the wire


-- Steven Cardinale

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Desire

Have you ever wanted something so bad it physically hurts? Had your sights set on something and your brain won't let go of it? Desire implies a wish, maybe a wish for something unobtainable. Desire implies a craving, the force of physical appetite. But what are you craving? What do you desire? This kinda follows in line with my Wanting Is Better Than Having post.

I've had this discussion many times before, with many people. Do you truly want it or would you just like it? There is a huge distinction between want and like. Want implies a desire; it implies that I will do whatever it takes to get it. Like ... well like is just a wish. You know: "I'd like to win the lottery." You really can't want to win the lottery, it's just luck, so you really can't do anything about it. If the lottery is just a wish, a dream, and you can only "like" it, what question would you have to ask to "want" it. It's a different question. The question is more "I want to be rich" ... and even more than that, maybe it's "I want money not to matter by the time I'm 40." Now that's a different question, a different want.

In acting they ask you "what's your want?" What will you do anything to get? What's your real motivation? They don't ask "what would you like" because liking something is just a wish ... it doesn't force you to do something ... well anything.

So here's my question: "What do you crave?", "What do you desire?", "What pulls you from your sleep and won't let go of you?" ... could be a person, place or thing ... could be an idea. But don't pretend to want something when you only would just like it. We do that all the time. If you want something you'll do whatever it takes to get it. If you just like something ... well then you'll have the fantasy (you know the "I wonder what it would be like to be rich") but you wont do anything about it ... at least not anything serious.

So "What Do You Desire?"

See you on the wire

-- Steven Cardinale

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